did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
