i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
