Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
sarcasm needs its own font
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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