seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
