Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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