Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
