So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
