would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
