I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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