"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
