I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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