Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
