that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
