Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
