Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize