I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize
