I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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