I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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