Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
