1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Of course I have a pirate flag
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
