I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
