A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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