In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
