I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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