we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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