Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
