WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
