i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
me + whiskey = a bad person
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
