Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize