yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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