talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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