I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Less talking, more tequila
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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