Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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