Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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