I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
