I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
It's shark week go big or go home
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
