If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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