So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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