I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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