hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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