Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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