Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
