I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
