It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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