We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
