what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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