If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
barbara walters just said penis...
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
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