I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
