David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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