it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
