You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
