I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
